I only have as much time as it takes for the rest of the week's worth of Beth Moore Bible study homework to print. Why do printers always complain of running out of ink long before the ink is ACTUALLY gone? I know it would matter if the printer was used for more professional things but for every day stuff - bah. I should be able to force it to print as long as I want. I don't need a reminder to tell me "INK IS LOW" because I'll be able to SEE when it's no longer printing as boldly as I like. CRAP CRAP CRAP. It just grabbed two pages instead of one and I'm printing on two sides so this throws everything off. ARGH.
Speaking of crap, guess whose daughter says "dangit!"? I have tried to greatly reduce (if not eliminate) all such phrases from my vocabularly (I still THINK them quite loudly at times, often in direct relation to the daughter in question) but Superman hasn't changed his verbal habits at all. It doesn't bother him that Val exclaims (or sighs), "Oh dang it" if she drops something or isn't able to do something she wants. In fact, he started to correct her the other day and said, "Val we only say that if we're upset or frustrated" and I had to interject, "but she was, you missed the part where the doll didn't stay sitting where she wanted it to." I'm surprised she didn't scold the doll and put it in the corner. That's behavior she can mimic all she wants because I do NOT plan on altering those habits of mine!
So this Beth Moore Bible study. It's the first women's study I've done at our new church. Our new huge church with thousands of attendees. I was telling my mom it felt a little like going from a private Christian high school where you're skilled and talented at lots of things and salutatorian (I've never been able to spell that correctly, by the way) stand out and everyone knows you etc. to the public state university where suddenly everyone is just as skilled and talented as you are and only the truly brilliant people stand out.
There are two or three studies being run simultaneously but all the ladies meet together at the start of the evening for worship. I hate calling singing a bunch of songs "worship" because that's only part of it, but whatever. Anyhow, I sat there not knowing anyone and noticed the book of one of the other studies on the chair next to me. Then I noticed that the book's author was the women's ministries leader at our church. A published author. Gah. Then I looked at the super musically talented people leading us in "worship" and suddenly I wondered if the harmony I had been singing was "right." And then after that a really talented public speaker got up and gave announcements! And then a super gifted lady handed us brochures as we exited to our classes.
OK, well the point is I felt intimidated and suddenly very very small. It's good for me to feel that way, I think. Our old church was so much smaller and you could *almost* know everyone by name, or at least recognize their face. At this church you register for things online and check in to Bible study via computerized kiosks and have little bar code thingies (like your Raley's club card) to scan that allows you to print name tags for your kids as you drop them off in childcare.
It's an adjustment, but people are just people wherever you go and that's comforting.