This morning I explained the story of Jonah and the big fish to Val. She had learned about it in Sunday School and colored a picture of the big fish swallowing Jonah. (Have you ever noticed how many Bible stories are just not all that kid friendly? Wars, violence, throwing rocks at heads, big fish swallowing people who disobey, brothers wanting to kill their brother, adultry, blood, guts, etc..)
Me (explaining the picture): See, here's the big fish that God sent.
Val: The fish come and? and? EAT Jonah and... yucky.
Me: Yeah, fish don't usually eat people but this one was a special one. It swallowed Jonah because he was being disobedient to God and God wanted Jonah to listen to Him.
Val (probably hoping I don't employ similar tactics for disobedience): Oooooooh.
Me: And then after the big fish swallowed Jonah he wanted to listen to God. So what do you think Jonah learned, Val?
Val (seriously): Jonah don't like fish, Mommy.
I think that's a safe conclusion to arrive at. My work here is done.