Friday, February 8, 2008

Food for tho-wait I have something more important to do.

Last week I heard someone say on the radio, "it takes a special kind of stupid to forget to eat." Well, perhaps. And if so then I am that stupid because OMG eating is such a pain in the butt when it's cold. Eating means I have to wash my hands which means I have to get water on them which makes them cold and wet and causes me to shiver. And then I might have to use a knife or other utensils and because exactly two drops of blood are being circulated to my fingers at any given time I fumble and drop the silverware or smash my fingers in something. Smashing your fingers hurts but smashing COLD fingers hurts worse. Then, THEN, heaven forbid I consume something with a temperature colder than the air I'm breathing. Cereal and milk for breakfast? Yogurt? You have got to be kidding me. I can't park over a heater vent in this house. So it's easier to just not eat.

Also, I really do forget to eat (more like just put it off longer than is wise) when I'm busy. I feel like I have more important things to do than waste time eating. Eating messes up my plans and throws off the schedule. This would be well and good if I was consuming as many calories per day as I ought. However I fear that I am not.

I took a movie of me teaching Kem to throw things out of her play pen (I know I know but it's SO. CUTE.) and as I played it back I not only cringed at the sound of my recorded voice but also cringed at the sight of my recorded stick figure. I was so shocked by what I saw I marched right down to the store and bought terribly unhealthy frozen foods to provide me with quick and easy to prepare snacks. No more will I lie in bed in the middle of the night (usually after nursing - I know I KNOW... you don't need to tell me...) with a stomach gnawing at itself with hunger and me thinking to myself "it's too cold to get up, and besides there's nothing to eat that's quick and you're so so tired. Go back to sleep."

It would be nice to have my own personal chef who is always pushing delicious healthy concoctions on me but as luck would unfortunately have it I'm my own personal chef and I hate to cook. It would mean making enormous vats of things once a month and throwing the lot in the freezer in nice individual servings. But seriously, who has time to go to all that trouble? I have more important things to do. (Sarcasm, people.)

While cooking may be a waste of (my) time baking is certainly not. Baking heats the house and that, my friends, is useful. Anything to ease the load of the poor radiator. So, do any of you have idiot-proof recipes that freeze well? Please send them my way; I'd love to try them out.

Ironically, while I'm on a mission to gain Superman is on a mission to lose and boy is he ever a loser. For the first time in a long time (not counting the time I was pregnant and weighed more than I have ever weighed in my LIFE! exciting!) he weighs less than  100 pounds more than me.  The fat-free milk sits right next to the 2% milk in the fridge along with my disgustingly anti-diet mayonnaise and his fat-free version. I enjoy the REAL sour cream (mmmm.... nothing compares) and he suffers by on the horrible-tasting fat-free garbage, poor guy.


  1. "Eating means I have to wash my hands..."*blinks in uncomprehension*If I washed my hands every time I ate, I would have perpetually wrinkly hands.

  2. I totally identify with the forgetting to eat. For me, I just get 100% absorbed in whatever, and I look up, and it's five hours later.